I’ve been on vacation for the past week. There will be blogging but now I’m too tired. In the meantime, this video perfectly sums up my love for Sarah Palin.
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I <3 NY & Sarah Palin
Sunday, August 16th, 2009
The shame of lower Manhattan
Tuesday, August 4th, 2009Here’s something that makes me wonder how the elected officials and landowners involved have convinced themselves that they’re still worthy members of society: According to the Daily News, the Freedom Tower, and surrounding transit hub and memorial, won’t be completed until 2018.
2018.
Read it and weep.
That’s 17 years after the terrorist attacks. Meanwhile, excavation for the Empire State Building started on January 22, 1930. It opened on May 1, 1931. That’s barely more than a year! And I’m pretty sure they didn’t even have electricity in the 1930s! If you adjust for advances in technology, by today’s standards, we should be able to build the Freedom Tower in 45 minutes.
So what’s the problem? Well, Larry Silverstein, who leases the property, isn’t helping. This is the kind of guy Larry Silverstein is: His insurance policy was for $3.5 billion, but he wants double that, because since it was two planes, that means two separate attacks, which means he’s due closer to $7 billion. Makes sense. I mean, c’mon, $3.5 billion, what is that? That’s practically an insult. What can you buy with that? Cuba? Whatever. Clearly, he is an easy-going guy who wants to do the right thing: The right thing is collecting all the money ever printed in America.
Although, it also didn’t help that former Gov. Pataki appointed his buddy, John Whitehead, to the Lower Manhattan Development Corporation. You’d figure a successful banker would have experience with construction and economic development, right? I mean, that’s why I call my butcher when my sink is backed up. Seriously though, it must be fun to be a political appointee, unless you’re Michael Brown (although, in Bush’s defense, I believe that raising horses is qualification to run the country’s disaster-response agency. It makes just as much sense as abstinence-only programs and invading a country that didn’t attack us. Right?)
Then there’s dealing with the Port Authority, a bi-state agency that actually owns the site, and is also full of political appointees. They made an agreement in 2006, called the master development agreement, with Silverstein, which gave the PA control of the Freedom Tower and Silverstein would have to build some of the smaller towers. Problem was, it resulted in $132 million in late fees after multiple deadlines passed, because a random wall in the middle of the site prevented it from getting handed over…
You know what? Fuck this. This is ridiculous. Fuck everyone involved who handed al-Qaeda the win on this. Because they did win. We live in a constant state of fear and political bickering, we’ve given up our civil liberties for the illusion of safety and we’ve accepted that a big, gaping hole in lower Manhattan is just something to accept. For a country as jingoistic as America, I fail to understand why there isn’t rioting in the streets. It’s also the same reason that I refuse to acknowledge the Pledge of Allegiance or the Star Spangled Banner anymore. This country, and the standards we set for ourselves, it’s all a joke.
Poor Obama
Monday, July 27th, 2009President Obama is keeping good on his promise to have a beer with Henry Louis Gates Jr. and Sgt. James Crowley over the little spat that’s been captivating our racist hearts and minds. Brief yourself here.
I’m a little bummed on Obama’s choice of beer – Bud.
I was initially upset because I thought the guy had taste, and this is literally the most boring, neutral beer you could ever drink – Crowley is getting a Blue Moon, so clearly there are options.
But then I figured it out. A couple of months ago Obama and Biden went to a burger joint in DC and Obama asked for a spicy mustard, like a dijon. This prompted outrage in the conservative community from idiots like Sean Hannity, who somehow considered this an affront to American values. You can read about that nonsense here.
(Let’s set aside that in most places, if you ask for a dijon mustard, you get Grey Poupon, which is made by Kraft Foods, which is an American company).
So, I feel bad for Obama, but I’m also a little disappointed in him. He was probably all ready to order a really tasty beer, like a Hoegaarden or a La Fin du Monde, and then realized that by doing so he would appear to be an American-hating Muslim terrorist. So he settled on Bud, the beer McDonald’s would sell if McDonald’s could get a liquor license.
In one sense, I understand not giving the enemy fodder, no matter how ridiculous it is, but I really feel like he’s dropping the ball on beer-drinkers’ rights here. He should be standing up for our right to drink delicious foreign beers instead of settling on bland, American-made brews.
Not ready for prime time
Tuesday, July 21st, 2009In an interview with City Hall News, which you can read here, Rep. Carolyn Maloney made a pretty huge mistake. She dropped the n-bomb.
Here’s the offending paragraph: There is Carolyn Maloney, ripping into Kirsten Gillibrand broad and hard for voting against the two stimulus bills and for changing her positions on several core Democratic issues, sounding out her case on the fly as, “It’s the NRA, it’s immigration, it’s all these other things. In fact, I got a call from someone from Puerto Rico, said [Gillibrand] went to Puerto Rico and came out for English-only [education]. And he said, ‘It was like saying n—r to a Puerto Rican,’” she said, using the full racial slur. “I don’t know—I don’t know if that’s true or not. I just called. I’m just throwing that out. All of her—well, what does she stand for?”
Maloney isn’t a big fan of Gillibrand, and plans on challenging her for New York’s Senate seat when Gillibrand is up for re-election. I’m pretty sure she just ruined her chances.
I mean, look, the establishment is pretty much already lined up behind Gillibrand. She has Schumer, which is pretty much all anyone could ever need in New York State. Besides a few holdouts, she’s got strong support and looks pretty solid. It was a tough enough road to hoe.
Now, I’m not even going to get into the nature or meaning of the n-bomb. Maloney’s use of it, even in relaying a story from someone else, is problematic for one simple reason: She said it to a reporter. Maybe you can get away with saying the word to someone behind closed doors, but to a reporter? Who is writing a story about you? C’mon! Sharpton is eating this up.
The simple fact is this: If you think it’s OK to say something like that to a reporter you are not ready to be a U.S. Senator. Simple as that.
Really, she’s lucky City Hall News didn’t put a big pull-quote on the front page, or a headline like: “Maloney drops political bombshell on herself.” Instead, they put it in the story and left it at that.
Doesn’t matter. The damage is done.
Oh, what a world…
Thursday, July 16th, 2009Did you know that in Albany, in exchange for political allegiance, you get awarded a committee chairmanship that adds $12,500 onto your salary? Despite the fact that you (allegedly) slashed your girlfriend’s face open with a broken piece of glass? And when our elected leaders are confronted over who’s responsible for doing something that’s maybe illegal and definitely immoral, they’ll all lie about it?
Read about it here. Read about it and weep, long and hard.
Yes we did!
Wednesday, July 15th, 2009
Chia Obama. Is in my house. For reals.
My girlfriend decided she couldn’t live without one of these abominations. Our apartment is now home to two of them – one to display an odd sense of patriotism laced with racism, and another to darken someone else’s door.
Keep an eye on this blog, because nowhere else will you find someone tracking the green afro that will sprout from the Chia Obama. At Blogduggery you will get exciting, occasional updates about a plant. All hail the internets!
(That’s not true. Some idiot is going to put up a blog and add thought bubbles or something and then get a book deal. I live in a world dominated by LOL cats. That’s the way the universe works, and that’s why I hate the universe.)
I think what disappoints me most is that there are actually two different kinds. Happy Obama and Determined Obama. I want both now, after not wanting either.
On one hand, I’m glad that my chia-president-pet looks determined, because we’re in the middle of two wars, an environmental crisis and a financial meltdown. I want him to be determined to solve these problems. But at the same time, if he cracked a smile, maybe that would encourage me, that things will be OK? Some questions I just can’t answer.
Though, doesn’t Obama look slightly like Bush? I looked at it real quick when I saw the open box and thought Chia had pulled a terrible trick on us. I’ve worked so hard to put the last eight years out of my mind, and I don’t want to have to deal with the Bush years until I’m older and can afford therapy.
Poor, poor Sonia
Wednesday, July 15th, 2009I like to keep NY1 on during the day. Which means, since Monday morning, I’ve been watching nothing but Sonia Sotomayor’s confirmation hearing. Three days of this, and I feel really bad for her.
She made it this far, and that coupled with the partisan split in the Senate means she’s going to get confirmed. Done deal. The problem is that the Senate has to have the confirmation hearing anyway, which means lots of senators blustering about their pet issues in the form of questions, so they can remind everyone of where they stand on gun control and abortion.
Every question sounds like this:
Random senator: Blah blah thanks for being here blah blah such an honor blah blah this is so historic and I am honored to be here for it. So, anyway, I feel very strongly about issue A. Issue A is incredibly important to me and my constituents. Oh wait, this has to be in the form of a question. Well, how do you feel about issue A?
Sonia Sotomayor: Despite the fact that this issue has barely anything to do with the job, I will offer a calculated and mature response because, c’mon, I’m going to be a freaking Supreme Court Judge, and even if it means suffering your nonsense for a few days, it’s still worth it.
Seriously, this is really monumentally boring. Some people say that watching the inner-workings of government is like watching sausage get made. I disagree. Sausage is wonderful and delicious. Watching the inner-workings of government is like watching every episode of Gilmore Girls while getting beaten by Mormons, except more depressing.
Really, MTA? REALLY?!?
Monday, July 13th, 2009The Verrazano Bridge is the only way for Staten Island residents to drive into any of the other four boroughs, without hooking through stupid New Jersey. Yesterday the MTA raised the toll from $10 to $11.
The bridge is a major artery, and travelers going up and down the Eastern seaboard are more likely to take that than to go the long way through stupid New Jersey. So, a small, tiny, overly-rational part of me understands why that bridge is much more expensive than every other bridge or tunnel in the city (and probably the world).
I mean, if you have E-ZPass, you only pay the arbitrary sum of $9.14. If you have both E-ZPass and you’re a Staten Island resident, you pay the equally arbitrary sum of $5.48.
Here’s my problem with that: The bridge, again, is the only way to drive into the rest of the city. They don’t allow cars on the ferry anymore. If all New Yorkers were created equal, then you’d figure that the E-ZPass discount on all the other bridges and tunnels would be the same, right? I mean, it’s OK to punish outsiders as long as all New Yorkers are able to pay the same price.
Except the E-ZPass discount on the RFK, the Bronx-Whitestone, the Throgs Neck, the Brooklyn-Battery Tunnel and the Queens Midtown Tunnel is $4.57 (down from the full price of $5.50).
So, if you live in Queens, and you want to visit the Bronx, you pay $4.57. That’s if you have to pay a toll. With such an insane network of roads, I’ve done plenty of inter-borough driving without paying a toll.
If you are a Staten Islander and you want to visit any other part of the city, it costs $5.48.
I know it’s popular to rag on Staten Island, but you know what? That’s messed up. Sure, it’s only a difference of 91 cents, but it’s a principal thing.
Unfortunately, the borough’s slim population leaves it with fewer elected officials and therefore less clout, so this will never change, but it should, because it’s just not right. I’m pretty confident the MTA is the worst agency ever, and that’s part of the problem.
Seriously guys. You suck.
Is it finally over?
Thursday, July 9th, 2009It looks like the stalemate in Albany is over. You can catch yourself up on Liz Benjamin’s blog at the Daily News.
Essentially, Pedro Espada, the Democratic senator who held the entire state hostage for the last, what, five weeks? Yea, he went back to the Democrats after defecting to the Republicans. For his trouble, and for our suffering, he earned a leadership post. One of the top ones. And probably a bunch of other cool stuff that we don’t even know about. Kids, this is how government works.
This is after Gov. Paterson appointed a lieutenant governor, even though the state Constitution doesn’t say he can. His argument was that the Constitution doesn’t say he can’t. I mean, he was smart to pick a guy like Richard Ravitch. The guy’s got cred. It’s just weird that four of our state’s top officials – Paterson, DiNapoli, Gillibrand and now Ravitch – weren’t actually elected to the posts they’re holding.
I did a Google image search for clowns to illustrate this post, because I figured they would visually represent how I felt about our elected officials in Albany. Problem is, all the pictures of clowns that come up are terrifying.
Palin for LG
Wednesday, July 8th, 2009There’s a rumor going around that Gov. David Paterson is going to appoint a lieutenant governor today. You can read about the speculation here.
The LG casts the tiebreaker vote in a tied Senate chamber, but when Spitzer resigned and Paterson took the top seat, the position was never filled, because there’s no function in the state Constitution to fill the vacancy. But certain groups have argued that the state’s Public Officers Law would allow for it, although the Republicans are probably going to challenge it in court. Appointing the post, if it survived the legal challenges, could compel the Senate to actually do some work.
Anyway.
Paterson probably has a pretty good idea who he’s going to appoint, since the press conference is happening in 2 and a half hours, but I have a last-minute suggestion.
Sarah Palin.
She’s perfect. It’s a bi-partisan appointment, since she’s a Republican, which might placate the GOP and keep them from suing. We’ll be treated to constant Palin-isms, which would enrich our lives with the gift of unintentional comedy. Besides casting that tiebreaking vote, the LG literally does nothing – Alfred DelBello resigned from the post in 1985 because then-Gov. Cuomo didn’t give him anything to do and he was bored! By the end of July, she’s going to be looking for a job anyway.
I’ve got my fingers crossed that we’ll see Sarah at the podium with him in a few hours.
(As I was typing this, NY1 caught up with Paterson, who declined to answer whether he was going to appoint anyone. In politics, silence can usually be taken in the affirmative).